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Full swap swingers or not?

- In Lifestyle

One of our readers, let’s call him Bob, came up with an interesting subject. He and his wife experienced more than once that couples, who say they are real full swap swingers, turned out to be not so willing to swap at all. Either the man or in more cases the woman seemed reluctant to have sex. He came up with some tips as how to tell if full swap couples who advertise that they are full swap, really are full swap.

Bob told us that his current wife without a doubt is a genuine full swap swinger. When he met his former wife however he already was in the lifestyle and introduced her as well in his hopes and dreams that she will change to be a joyful full swap swinger wife. “Unfortunately, I was misled by my own thinking that she was a willing participant. I wrongly made a swinger site profile that we were a full swap couple.  I would take her to swinger clubs and parties and think she was really enjoying herself, but was I wrong.  She didn’t like swinging at all and over time, I finally realized that my dream of being married to a full swap swinger was my dream. It was my fault to wrongly claim that I was married to a joyful full swap swinger.  True story and that can be your first story.”

Bob told us some signals he and his current wife noticed that the woman of a couple is not a joyful willing full swap swinger participant that her husband dreams she is:

The signals are not in any particular order, and for party you can also read house party, swinger party, swinger club or a meeting amongst 2 couples:

  • Do you have to sweet talk her to attend a party?
  • Does she complain about ‘not wanting to have another party’?
  • Is she shy to wear lingerie at a party?
  • Is her lingerie at a party a simple solid-colour dress slip?
  • Does she lead at parties in removing her clothes?
  • Is she willingly involved in the full swap or orgy (or only standing and/or looking)?
  • Do you routinely have to coach her to go participate with people you are with?
  • When you’re in bed with a player or other players, is she participating in bed or is she just on the bed and petting only?
  • Do you have to talk to her in the other room and ask her what’s wrong?
  • Does she begin her period unexpectedly during a party?
  • Does she want to leave the party early for an unknown reason?

What is your opinion or are your experiences on this subject? Have you ever been on a date or to a party, finding that the woman or man of the couple is reluctant to have sex with you but agreed to do so in order to please her or his spouse?

Comments   

 
+97 #1 Jon 2012-04-15 15:49
Just because a woman wants to full swap with some people doesn't mean she wants to full swap with anyone. If "full swap" means wanting to swap with anyone, then the number of "real full swap couples" will be quite small. The lifestyle is about freedom and honesty, not judging others.
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+30 #2 Ron 2012-04-15 20:16
Agree with Jon. Could be a lack of communication, and tyhe woman is not interested in anyone she sees. Also, she may there to take one for the team and is having second thoughts.

Full swap does not mean full time swap.
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+25 #3 Nany 2012-04-17 01:22
Being a swinger is break the routine in marriage. don't let swinger life to be routine that will kill the married life
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+24 #4 RED 2012-04-21 21:17
I agree with all above. Sometimes my male partner and I meet people that only one of us is interested in. We do "take one for the team", so before we get down to sex, we do talk and decide to stay or not stay. In the article above, "Bob" is correct in the above "signals". If you have to talk someone into playing, then there is a problem. Communication is the key for any kind of situation and relationship. I also agree that they "Lifestyle" shouldn't consume your marriage/relati onship.
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+23 #5 Foxx 2012-04-23 02:59
I agree, but like Ron says: Full swap does not mean full time swap..

In other words, I believe you can be a full swap swingers, even though you don't act like it all the time or every time..

And I totally agree with Jon! I consider myself "full swap", but I don't do each and every willing person I meet out there anyway.. And I guess that's the way it is for most of us.

By the way.. If "full swap" means wanting to swap with anyone, no matter have intellectual they are, no matter what they look like or how bad they might look, how they treat you, how they act, what their desires are and so on, then I am NOT a "full swap" anymore!.. Seriously.. And anything else would be a little abnormal, if you ask me. Most people, included full swap swingers, usually don't do anyone..
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+8 #6 Foxx 2012-04-23 03:04
Note: That was not meant as criticism to anyone.
No matter what you prefer, like or dislike, I do respect you. It's just my personal opinion and I sometimes have problems with keeping my mouth shut when it comes to topics that interest me.. ;)
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+6 #7 Bob 2012-04-23 22:29
This article is about the player you see at many of your local parties who their profile states full swap but you never see that person do anybody at any time. Ron brings a valid point “just because a woman is categorized as FULL SWAP, does not mean she has to full swap with every person at every party, “BUT”, this article is about the player who lists their character profile as full swap but never full swap with anybody at any time. It is “each person’s individual choice to choose” whether soft or full swap, and if they “choose” themselves as full swap, and never full swap, then update the profile. If I see a trend of that player always having an excuse not to play with anybody, at all the local gatherings (and it’s not about me), then I have every right to judge that player, and therefore I disagree with Jon that I don’t have the right to judge. I’m not making my determination on one person at one party. We play at many parties and look for the above non-play signals.
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+9 #8 ROMAN 2012-04-27 15:00
ESTOY TOTALMENTE DE ACUERDO...HAY PAREJAS QUE SE DICEN TOTALMENTE LIBERALES Y DESPUÉS DE HACERTE DAR UN MONTÓN DE VUELTAS...CUAND O LLEGAS AL MOMENTO EN QUE LA MUJER DE EL ESTA ENLOQUECIDA DE CALIENTE COMIÉNDOTE TODA LA POLLA.. EL INDECISO DEL MARIDO LA MIRA COMO RECLAMÁNDOLE UN POCO DE CORDURA...Y ENCIMA NO LOGRA UNA BUENA ERECCIÓN PARA SATISFACER A TU MUJER... ESTO ES LO QUE NOS PASO CON UN MATRIMONIO CON EL QUE ESTUVIMOS MAS DE 6 (SEIS)MESES !PARA CONCRETAR UN ENCUENTRO QUE AL FINAL FALLO EN LA PARTE MASCULINA...LA VERDAD ES QUE ES IMPOSIBLE SABER COMO VA A RESULTAR EL ENCUENTRO...HAY QUE JUGARSE Y PARTICIPAR LAS MUJERES SON UN POQUITO REMISAS A ZAMBULLIRSE EN LAS AGUAS DEL DESEO...PERO UNA VEZ QUE EMPEZARON...NO PARAN MAS...SON INSACIABLES...C ON DECIRLES QUE ESTA MUJER ME PIDIÓ DISCULPAS POR LA FLOJA ACTUACIÓN DEL MARIDO Y SE OFRECIÓ PARA UN TRÍO EN MI CASA QUE LUEGO REALIZAMOS...
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+13 #9 ROMAN 2012-04-27 15:02
HAY QUE TENER LA CABEZA DEL SWINGER PARA ESTAR DISPUESTO A PARTICIPAR CON TODO EL CUERPO Y LA MENTE EN ESTOS ENCUENTROS EXTREMOS DE PLACER Y SEXO...SI NO...NO VAYAS...
UN ABRAZO GRANDE A TODOS LOS SWINGERS DE CORAZON...ELLOS SABEN DE QUE ESTOY HABLANDO...
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+14 #10 Will 2012-09-22 18:11
Putting your wife in such situations without honestly discussing this first is just wrong. At the first sign of resistance, you should get the hint.
That being said, there is a HUGE difference between the party scene, and intimate meetings. My wife despises the party scene, we both do. We don't attend them any more. But, we get our freak on in seperate rooms with the right couples.
Maybe there should be a designation between Full-Swap Social, and Full-Swap Intimate... ?
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+4 #11 Suzanne Boulanger 2013-01-10 16:51
It's not for everyone for sure, but when both of you are into swapping it is supposed to be fun [and it is! Don't do it just to please your partner because it doesn't work like that. You either are or you're not. We went to a party on New Year's Eve and the couple sitting next us was clearly not matched - she was dressed like she was going to church and never removed any of her clothing. He was the swinger - not her! We are true swingers, we like it, we have a lot of fun and we respect each other and other couples. We don't have sex with everyone we meet - something has to click. Sometimes, I am not that into the man but if he has some good moves and knows how to please a woman - I just close my eyes and enjoy it!!!
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+2 #12 Michael 2013-02-14 17:59
There are plenty of fakers out there for many different reasons. Some of them seem inappropriate but can strengthen a relationship. Those that say they don't take one for the team must not have much fun because our experience says there are times when either of us aren't exactly turned on but want the other to have fun so we go with it. If we meet you we have already discussed all this beforehand and ready to go. We are a great full swap couple but we don't go to parties and are only looking to share a connection 1 couple at a time. So we would have to say throw out everything you have about parties. Actions here don't determine anything.
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+11 #13 Cindy Hoods 2013-03-29 21:04
Quoting Bob:
...the player who lists their character profile as full swap but never full swap with anybody at any time


First of all unless you actually know this player, you don't know for certain that they "never" swap with anybody at any time. You just know you've never seen them swap in your presence.
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+2 #14 Chris 2014-02-26 15:45
Many times I have seen where the male is full swap while his female partner isn't.
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+1 #15 Will 2015-01-18 17:58
I think Chris 100% correct up to a point with allot of couples. That is "the line". Once the wife crosses "the line", then the afterburners kick in and she takes off, and really becomes the sex engine that is totally into it.
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+1 #16 Chris 2015-07-11 00:42
Generally women are more picky than men. And... Vast majority of men are not that attractive, especially older couples.
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+1 #17 Harry 2015-08-15 20:56
From what I have heard and read about, my first wife and I were a rather randy pair of sexual addicts. We had sexual intercourse practically every night, with extra on a Saturday and on a Sunday. We had contact with a young 22 year old guy for really exciting telephone chats. When one of us was chatting to him, the other one was busy performing a sexual act on the other. It was usually an oral activity and it added enormously to the excitement and enjoyment of a telephone chat. It eventually led to us inviting him to spend a weekend with us and it was so exciting and satisfying that it became a regular event, much to the fulfilment and satisfaction for all 3 of us.
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+1 #18 K&J 2017-01-01 14:07
We met us with a couple who claimed they were full swap. We went to their house, chatted for a bit and decided to proceed. Once we got in the bedroom they disclosed that they don't get undressed. They don't kiss. We women performed oral to get the guys going but when it was time to switch, "oh we don't do that" WTF??? They were not a full swap couple. False advertising! They don't kiss, don't undress and don't perform oral on the ladies. I don't know what kind of couple you would call that, but it AINT FULL SWAP!! So now, during our meet and greet we have to tell this story to make sure we are all on the same page.
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+1 #19 Swing! 2017-08-05 13:36
We are full swap swingers but we have become more selective. In our first year of swinging we played quite frequently and with almost anyone. Now days we play much less frequently but it's on our terms. We don't play with everyone every time & we basically have a stable of play partners we have known for years that we hook up with. We do love hooking up with new couples & singles, but now we like to feel some sort of connection going on.
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